A Testamemt To My Cluelessness


I had an epiphany last week. Kind of a life-changing epiphany. With as much navel gazing as someone who has been blogging for nine years must have done, you would think I would have come across this by now. I am an introvert. I am also pretty oblivious (obviously).

This came about when I was talking to my boss about something and I told her I didn’t know whether I was an extrovert or an introvert. She said, “You are a green…probably an introvert” which was this color personality thing we did which really explains the people I work with and is much less complicated than the INTEP thing or whatever that was.

Exhibit #1 When I was in my early 20s (circa 1992) I lived outside a town of about 300 people, located 90 miles from any larger town. I had no friends outside of co-workers, although I knew lots of people. I had no TV. I had my day job and I worked evenings as a cook and waitress in the local bar/fine dining establishment/pool hall a couple nights a week. Otherwise I was at my little rental house behind my landlord’s big ranch house. I might have been lonely from time to time, but I was completely content. The librarian had my library card memorized.

I think an extrovert would have either made friends and gone out and partied or gone crazy in that situation.

Exhibit #2 I hate living in town. I go out to my back yard and then I end up talking to my neighbors, all of whom are nice, but maybe I just want privacy outside. I grew up 3 miles from the nearest neighbor and I liked it that way. When I win the lottery, maybe I will install a different fence than my waist high chain-link fence. Maybe not, I like being able to see out. I think of Jean Auel’s “Clan of the Cave Bear” where you don’t look into the other cave inhabitants’ living space as a form of courtesy. People in my alley just don’t get that.

Exhibit #3 I am around people all day, which is fine, I like my co-workers and most of the patrons, but then I come home to all these people I made and they want my attention too. All I want is some alone time. And when the kids are at their dad’s, my boyfriend is hanging around. I probably can fix that some.

Exhibit #4 I hardly have any friends here, and I hardly ever go out or entertain. I joined a service sorority because I knew I needed to make friends. I guess my only friends in my last town were from MOPS which I joined because I knew I needed to make friends. But I am content like this.

Clearly I am not way over on the scale or anything, but there you have it. I am an introvert. Next on my list of books to read is “The Birth Order Book” maybe I will discover I am a first-born!

A man with a purse


Last night we had an author come to speak at the library. I had to help the author’s wife sell books after the talk so I handed my boyfriend my purse and I climbed behind the table to help out. When things died down Ed found me and gave me my (pretty small, black) purse back. He told me he had been talking to his ex-wife and she was looking at him weird because of the purse. I didn’t have the heart to tell him his chances with her were slim at best.

He introduced me to her. She was beyond cordial, she was downright nice. They have been divorced 18 years. (Keep in mind he is 21 years older than me) She talked books with me. Nice neutral ground.

Ed tells people his ex ran off with his hired man (ranch hand). “…I sure do miss him, he was the best man I ever had.” She actually did and they are married now. Ed left his wife running the ranch and raising the kids while he was off rodeoing. She finally had enough. He has nothing but nice things to say about her.

I don’t have much to add except the author was Craig Johnson, who writes smart-funny murder mysteries based in Wyoming. The A&E series, Longmire is based on his characters. If he comes to your town, go see him. He is a great speaker, even if you haven’t read the books.

Outlander #8 no spoilers & Mother of the Year Update

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Words I learned while reading “Written in My Own Heart’s Blood.”
Absquatulate-to abscond with
Leporello-cannot find in dictionary, or online
Subfusc-dusk or a brown
Quoits-something to do with a circle of rope thrown in a game
A word that started with a W I lost track of in the 400s or 500s.
(If you happen across it, please let me know-I think it was on the left side of the page)

I am still in mourning that I have finished the book. I am sure the person who has been waiting for it will be happy to get it, but sadly it is coming apart after two readings and will have to be mended first. I was careful with it, and I suspect the other person was too, but people, you have to sew big books together. Glue will not hold an 800 page book together. Look at your Bible. It is sewn, see? Big book-sewn.

I have not been watching the series. I really should watch more TV.

My daughter is on her fifth non-consecutive day of grounding since Sept 22. This means right to her room after school, until morning. I don’t check her homework or feed her supper these days. Her math homework has suffered as a consequence. She probably has some sort of food stash which will probably attract mice. It might be the reason we are out of cereal.

I asked her father to talk to her as well. Apparently he told her he never lies, but they know he cheated on his girlfriend last summer, the kids saw him kissing another woman-definitely cheating to them-so that was a mixed message at best. Lydia said she put that in her BS filter. (Atta girl, at least she can spot one) Looking back on it, it was poor judgement on my part, but I thought he should be aware of the problem.

Everybody lies sometimes, but when I am asked a direct question, I am a crappy liar. I just need to know if she has homework, if it is completed and if it has been checked.

Nobody else is doing chores half the time so I am not cooking supper half the time or buying groceries. If they don’t help, why should they expect me to do their chores and mine? Remember when that mom camped out in her front yard I the early 1980s? If it wasn’t October…

Clearly this is not working. What I need here is a four-part plan. 🙂